Marnee Reiley, M.A., LMFT          Counseling in Irvine, Orange County, CA
949-648-7991
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Observing Your Thoughts Without Judgment

4/26/2016

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I just contributed to a column on How to Practice Self Love. Over 50 therapists added their ideas.  Here's my take on it...find the full article at this link:  Observing Your Thoughts without Judgment.

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How to Stop Overthinking

7/3/2015

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Our brains are wonderful, powerful tools that help us reason and plan.  But when we're stressed and overcome with worry, we can find ourselves in a vicious cycle of overthinking.  This week, clinicians offered their tips on PersonalDevelopmentCafe.com on how to put an end to overthinking.  Ideas included meditation, mindfulness, and more.  See #6 to read my contribution on stopping the "analysis paralysis" by asking yourself one simple question.  What works for you when you find yourself in a loop of anxious thoughts?

Click here to learn How To Stop Overthinking.
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How To Be Your Authentic Self

4/28/2015

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You'd think it'd be easy to be your authentic self, wouldn't you?  Just let your true essence shine through, right?  If only it were so simple.  Our fears come into play and stop us in our tracks.  What if I'm rejected?  What if they don't like the real me?  

Click the link below for some tips on how to live more authentically.  My contribution is #2!  

How To Be Your Authentic Self
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How to Love Yourself

4/9/2015

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When we're busy caring for others, we can neglect our own needs.  This leads to burnout, resentment, and overwhelm.  By elevating self-care from a luxury to a necessity, we practice self-love and are able to refill our own supplies of energy, joy, and motivation.

I recently contributed to a personal development blog on this very subject.  Scroll down to entry #6 at the link below to see my tips for showing yourself the love you deserve.

How to Love Yourself

What are some of the things you do to prioritize your needs?
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5 Steps to Improving Your Self-Esteem

4/8/2015

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I was recently asked to be a contributor for a website dedicated to personal development.  The topic was a particular favorite of mine: how to improve your self-esteem.   Many other counselors and therapists weighed in with their unique perspectives.  If something resonated with you I'd love to hear about it in the comment section below!

Here's the link to the article:

"How To Improve Your Self-Esteem."
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Dance Like Nobody's Watching!

4/2/2013

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So maybe I'll never have THESE moves...
"The devil's a liar!  Don't listen to him!  There are angels all around you!"

No, these weren't the words belted out across the pews at a church on a Sunday morning.  This was inspiration found in a weekday funk dance class.

I'd decided to try an intriguing new class, CardioFunk, offered at my local gym.  Scanning the others in the studio, it was clear that I wasn't going to be the only one relatively new to this style.  There's something about dancing that can bring out insecurities and self-consciousness, making an otherwise capable adult feel as vulnerable as a gangly teen at a school formal. 

Luckily, the instructor was onto us.  Milo had enough experience teaching hip hop to suburbanites to know that we just might be feeling, well, a touch un-cool.  That's when he started with the verbal support.

"Don't listen to that voice that's bringing you down.  That's the devil and he's a liar! Let loose and dance like you're alone at home."

Milo's words were enthusiastic enough to override the negative thoughts that were threatening to derail our fun.  His message was clear: the more you just go for it, the more confident you'll look and feel.  I often use cognitive behavioral therapy techniques in my counseling work.  I know how powerful our thoughts can be in affecting our feelings.  Who knew I'd be reminded of a principle of psychology in my morning gym class?  Thank you, Milo, for guiding us out of our heads and onto the dance floor.

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    Marnee Reiley is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist working with couples and adults in Irvine, Orange County, California.

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